Comedy (a possible stand up sketch)

Ahem. Hello, hello. Ah. This is my first time to do a stand up, so please be gentle, okay?

As this is my first time to this sort of thing, I have tried to look up how to make this little thing entertaining. So, I searched for things that make people laugh.

And you know they did scientific reseach on this topic, and you know what they found to be the most likely things to make people laugh?

Things that are not actually funny.

...I'm screwed.

But have you noticed that comedians don't really tell jokes anymore? No, do you know what they do? They talk about stuff. Apparently real life is so ridiculous that comedians make people laugh just by talking about it. That's really sad when you think about it. Of course, they tell it with a certain flair that makes it funny instead of depressing. This 'flair' really depends on your audience. If your audience is left-wing, you talk about the stupidity of the right-wing. If your audience is right-wing, you talk about the stupidity of the left-wing. If you are Anglo-Saxon you talk about Indians. If you are Indian you talk about the Japanese. If you are Japanese there will be two of you; one to be stupid and the other to provide the physical abuse that signals for the audience that it is okay to laugh now.

Now the only thing left is for some smart-ass to realise this and attempt a stand up based around this... oh, wait. Ha.

You can can either laugh at the stupidity of life or you can cry because of it, folks.